Follow these simple steps to achieve a picture-perfect family photo:

Step 1: Find a relatively clean space to squeeze eight people so all faces are showing.

Step 2: Convince the napless boy who already had a very long day that he can, indeed, stand still for another five minutes . . . okay three minutes. If necessary, bribe with M&Ms.

Step 3: Remind everyone over age three to look forward and keep smiling. No rabbit ears back there!

Step 4: Tag team the baby, also napless, also suffering from a very long day. Remind yourself that she is still in training. Consider actually giving her that bottle she’s focused on.

Step 5: Do a quick analysis of your photo editing skills.  Are you capable of pasting the baby into the photo?  If yes, you are finished.  If no, continue to step 6.

Step 6: After reminding everyone to look forward and keep smiling no matter what, make baby laugh using her favorite trick.

Step 7: Remind the photographer to take the picture after the baby lands.  Also remind girls in back row to resist the effects of gravity.  This is also a good time to casually insert an M&M reminder.

Step 8: Lower your standards.

Step 9: Success! Let’s go eat…M&Ms, what else?!

When tempted to compare your life or family to the glimpses you have of another person’s life or family, remember that behind every “perfect” picture are a whole lot of retakes, and quite possibly a little boy who, despite some solid training, is being held in place by the promise of M&Ms.

Special thanks to my brother, Jonathon, for the photo session!

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